Spanking your kids and parenting

[Lukeje]

And you haven't heard my authoritative tone of voice.

I heard it was pretty sexy ^^

?

 

[Morderkaine]

[quote="fish food carl" post="18.76423.903135
First off... Not in a physical sense. I was just taught that certain things are dangerous, before I was harmed by them. No parent should just say, "Oh dear, don't tell Timmy that fire really hurts, let him try swimming in it and find out for himself." You say, "Timmy, fire is very dangerous. It will hurt you very badly. Do you understand Timmy?"
[/quote]

And then when timmy walks towards the fire a second time, and you explain to him again. And then another day tries it again a third time, then you spank. Cause what you did before wasnt working. Of course it will probably work most times, when it doesnt then you need something else.

And to what Lord_Foortwenti said - I agree 100%. I would quote it but its too long. Very well put.

 

[Evilbunny]

I've worked at a summer sleep away camp for the past four years as a counselor and I would say the majority of kids there don't stop doing shit if I just tell them not to. I have to punish them in some way (obviously I can't hit them, I punish them by taking away their canteen or something)and sometimes even that doesn't work. I am convinced the majority of these kids could benefit from a good spanking.

Huh, sounds like they're doing a pretty good job of punishing you without resorting to physical violence...

Wait, did you not read that last part? Sometimes nonviolence doesn't work. There have been many kids that despite us punishing them over and over again by forcing themm to stay in the cabin except during meal time and taking away their canteen, they still start fights with other kids, don't listen to us, and just generally behave badly. These kids need some stronger incentive to not act this way, and since we can't hit them, we're stuck having to endure these little terrors.

 

[gantzsurvivor1]

Looking back I'm glad my parents beat the crap outta me. cause if they didn't i don't know how i would of turned out. cause every kid i hung out with when i was a kid. if their parents didn't whoop them they was always stuck up spoiled brats. i mean yeah i deserved all the beatings I got. And I'm glad my parents did what they did to get their point across.

 

[Lukeje]

And then when timmy walks towards the fire a second time, and you explain to him again. And then another day tries it again a third time, then you spank. Cause what you did before wasnt working. Of course it will probably work most times, when it doesnt then you need something else.

So he burns himself, and he learns that way. He'd then take you more seriously in the future (NOTE I am not condoning letting children burn themselves, just pointing out that it seems to be an inevitable consequence of this scenario, as there's no guarantee that even after you hit him, he won't try to do it again).

 

[Varchld]

I heard it was pretty sexy ^^

?

Just joking

Common sense. Which has a higher chance of growing up committing crimes - a child with proper discipline at home (of whatever form you deem the most effective) or one who receives no dicipline at home at all with parents who dont care what he or she does.
Of course the kid with no discipline is more likely to grow up wrong. So it stands to reason that if all kids received proper discipline the percentage of kids growing up wrong and committing crimes would decrease, ergo there are cases where better dicipline at home would have prevented what happened.

You're not taking into account all of the effects of discipline, or stating whether you're refering to spanking or other types of discipline.
A kid who's spanked is generally going to grow up in a more violent environment to one who is disciplined through other means imo.

 

[Hunde Des Krieg]

I was spanked as a child and I am damn respectful because of it... my dad also came up with interesting punishments too. plus he was a scary guy... big and tough, and loud. and because of his discipline I am a kind, well mannered and respectful person.
I don't know if striking a child is really necasary but being intimidating is, if you can't intimidate your child then he/she will walk all over you. You must be firm and strong, not giving an inch, maybe a milimeter but no more. I know my mom was a crap disciplinarian(even with our dogs) but my dad wasn't and I know why... I was afraid of him. you don't negotiate with children when they do something wrong, that teaches them to work the system, which they then feel means they can get away with anything.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

I realize that's not exactly on point, but, best relevant statistics I could find.

Difficult one I know, I'm only able to find stats from 2003 as well for some reason; but remember Cheeze; you're talking about gun-crime in there as well. Texas also has capital punishment and one of the higher cases of gun-crime/murder.

However, as England has banned it.
Truancy reaches record high [http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2006/sep/21/schools.uk1]
92% of teachers have been verbally abused [http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2007/feb/23/schools.uk2]
Nearly 10,000 children were expelled from school this year [http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/4022123.stm]

 

[Evilbunny]

I've worked at a summer sleep away camp for the past four years as a counselor and I would say the majority of kids there don't stop doing shit if I just tell them not to.

That's different than parenting. They probably won't listen because they have bad parents. Maybe...because their parents *do* hit them, and figure 'if you can't hit me, why should I fear you?'

That might be true of some of them, but I've seen quite a few of them interact with their parents, and the lack of respect they show in front of them surely wouldn't exist if their parents hit them at home. Here is one example that sticks out in my mind. A mother and her son are unpacking the car on the first day, and this is what happened.

Mother: charles, will you help me carry your clothes inside?
Kid: Shut up mom, you do it yourself.
Mother: (looks at me) What am I going to do with him?

I'll tell you what to do with him, kick his ass!!

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

So he now knows he can walk all over you now?

I hope he forgets me entirely.

Yeah...hope in one hand...

I think that's a problem for the therapist...I mean, I'm all for boys being boys and roughhousing, but...

That's bad? Grief...did you go private?
That was run of the mill for us.

That explains a lot about you, Root...[/quote]
I still have a stable job, a stable relationship and can speak politely to people without resorting to physical violence; which is a number of steps up from a lot of the populace these days.

 

[Lukeje]

I realize that's not exactly on point, but, best relevant statistics I could find.

Difficult one I know, I'm only able to find stats from 2003 as well for some reason; but remember Cheeze; you're talking about gun-crime in there as well. Texas also has capital punishment and one of the higher cases of gun-crime/murder.

However, as England has banned it.
Truancy reaches record high [http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2006/sep/21/schools.uk1]
92% of teachers have been verbally abused [http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2007/feb/23/schools.uk2]
Nearly 10,000 children were expelled from school this year [http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/4022123.stm]

And the data from when corporal punishment was allowed is... where?

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

So he burns himself, and he learns that way. He'd then take you more seriously in the future (NOTE I am not condoning letting children burn themselves, just pointing out that it seems to be an inevitable consequence of this scenario, as there's no guarantee that even after you hit him, he won't try to do it again).

Hell's teeth, please NEVER have children. I'd rather have a smacked backside than a smoking stump.


Anyway Cheeze, Lukeje, Carl...ante up. What HAVE you done in your past that you've been disciplined for and how was it administered?

 

[Evilbunny]

Here is one example that sticks out in my mind. A mother and her son are unpacking the car on the first day, and this is what happened.

Mother: charles, will you help me carry your clothes inside?
Kid: Shut up mom, you do it yourself.
Mother: (looks at me) What am I going to do with him?

I'll tell you what to do with him, kick his ass!!

Exactly--you go right from 'do nothing and let him get away with it' to 'kick his ass'.

There's no DEFCON 2 and 3 and 4 in between?

Were you not listening before? We tried punishing this kid all summer to make him behave, but since his mother was so lenient at home he was a disrespectful little **** and nothing got through to him. If your kid listens to you when you tell him to not do something then yay good for you, but sometimes that's not enough. Sometimes physical pain is the only thing he responds to.