Ultimate Barfight: Escapist Edition -Anyone can join the violence!-

[Stone Wera]

@shemming: Like any Bond villian would in your scenario.

I gather the D.G.M.Z.R.L.F.C.-anite[sup]TM[/sup] and sell it on the internet!

 

[Shemming]

I give up and sit under a table and start drinking/small talk.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

I use the force to exit the furnace dimension"Whenever you need a convienent plot twist,make shit up as you go along!"

 

[Shemming]

i hit PsychoticForesight with a rubber duck, only to have it explode!!!1!!!!

we are both instantly killed but i respawn as the terminator and shot-gun Stone Wera

 

[Safe in the Dark]

And I respawn as a ninja and hide silently drinking Vodka

 

[Shemming]

i bring out my anti-ninja srpay i borrowed from bat man and hit PF with it because theres no point spraying him with a piece of junk.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

Implodes and becomes the disembodied head of Colonel Sanders and begins shouting at Shemming "Eeeeverything you know is wrong! Black is white,up is down and short is long! And eeeverything you though was just so important doesn't matter! Eeeeverything you know is wrong! Just forget the words and sing along all you need to understand is....Eeeeverything you know is wroooong!"

 

[Shemming]

shemming sits down and eats a pie.

then he gets a flamethower and starts dancing

 

[Stone Wera]

I stae in disbelief at the giant shotgun hole in my chest. I panic (like usual) and smash Colonel Sander's disembodied face in with a bar stool.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

Eats the barstool and barfs out Freddy Krueger

 

[Shemming]

i use magic from the lore of kitteh to heal stone wera as a thanks for smashing sanders face, before hitting him with a firesaber lamp repetedly in the head.

 

[Stone Wera]

I punch Fred Krueger's face off and shout "I'M NOT DONE PANICKING YET!!" I shove him back down Sander's throat.

 

[Shemming]

i do nothing.

then i hit heart of darkness with a plastic mallet, it is super effective and he is killed.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

I swallow him and my neck poops out the incredible Hulk

 

[Stone Wera]

I take HoD's body and have a wonderous feast in the name of pirates everywhere (except Somalia)!

 

[Stone Wera]

I sing The Hulk a lullaby and turn him back into Bruce Banner. Then I eat kill Bruce in his sleep and eat him, too!

But before dinner, I proudly announce that... "COLONEL SANDERS WAS NEVER PROMOTED PAST PRIVATE!" Colonel Sanders is shocked that his secret is now out and slowly melts into a puddle of goop.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

Reforms as the disembodied head of Walt Disney flies over and bites Stone Wera's ears off

 

[Shemming]

i sit and have a drink.

 

[Stone Wera]

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

I panic once more and start beating the evil out of Walt Disney. He then realizes the error of his ways and thanks me. He then dons a hat and explains that he is going to Africa to help the starving children, and find a cure for cancer.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

Walt Disney then reveals his true form,Reanimates as the Floating Head of Hitler and begins biting the top of Stone Wera's skull