Useless Superpower

[Korolev]

There's a pretty legendary useless super power that was actually in the comics a long time ago: it was the ability to make your limbs spontaneously fall off, to be used as weapons. Literally, there was a character called "arm-fall-off-boy" whose only ability was to make his arm fall off, so that he could club someone on the head with his detached arm. The pointlessness of this power is mind-boggling - if you're going to use your arm to hit someone, why not just punch them? Why detach your arm to use as a club? And isn't it a bit stupid to use your own limb as a weapon? Why not a baseball bat?

better reach, more leverage...

and do you really want to carry a bat around with you all the time?

i'd want this only if i could then reattach my fallen limbs.

Well, okay - better reach is actually a fair point. But if you were a super hero, wouldn't you carry around a weapon all the time, like a bat or a fancy sword? Many others do. Plus, removing your arm to use as a club would endanger your arm (can you imagine using your arm to block a sword strike?) and it would basically handicap you - you wouldn't be able to defend yourself as effectively because you've only got one arm. I suppose the only advantage of this power would be to be able to temporarily remove one's limbs to fit into tight spaces, but even that's not much of a power.

So the power is worse that useless - it would actively handicap you in battle. It would be good only as a last ditch, last resort and even then there's probably better solutions, like running away.

 

[DANCEMASTERAFRO]

The super amazing ability to turn your tongue into hamburger but the hamburger does regenerate after you eat it.
The super amazing ability to taste everything you eat as though it's a mixture of sawdust, shit and rotten ejaculate.
Or my personal favourite :

 

[Chase Yojimbo]

The power to enable whoever I want and don't want to smell my fart...

 

[The Apothecarry]

The ability to play any Tool song flawlessly. It would be a lot of fun for me, but I'd look like a complete show-off to anyone else.

The ability to shapeshift into any anime character (voice and appearance) would only have practical uses at conventions.

 

[JDLY]

How about either of these-
http://superheroes.memebase.com/2010/08/13/sofapizzahtmlwingsvia-sleepinsnowhar-har/
http://superheroes.memebase.com/2010/08/13/the-high-definite160-a-new-breed-of-superhero/

 

[Wintermoot]

all of Superman,s powers but only if the planets align at a angle of 180 degrees
other then that future prediction but only useless stuff (like what you,re going to have for breakfast next day)

 

[mcnally86]

The ability to make random pop-culture references from East Jesus Nowhere while on forums. Quickly, First person to correctly guess the reference gets a cookie.

The power to hear the "Step By Step" theme song while "1 21 guns" is playing. I am the only one I know of with this power. I thinkg they play it 2 or 3 times during the song. I'm not a fan.

The power to lead, unleaded gasoline.

 

[Veldel]

The ability to shapeshift into a bucket of water.

Really, what were those twins called from that one TV show? There was a girl and a guy, and when they shapeshifted the guy was always a bucket of water and the girl was always slightly more useful, but not that much more. I can't think of their names nor the name of the show, but those two characters sucked. They were completely useless.

Also, I would love the ability to teleport like in Jumper. I would never actually draw attention to myself, but I would save tons of money on gas. Teleport into a store, buy what I want, and then teleport out right in front of everyone. Awesome. Who needs secrecy?

they where the wonder twins if thats who your thinking of lol

 

[Slash Joel]

"Like the power of Invisibility that only wworks when ur playing a trumbone."

-Yahtzee

 

[Krion_Vark]

what is your useless superpower?

Mine is the ability to make people adhere to stereotypes

The guy part of the wonder twins. Seriously he could only turn into inanimate objects like a rock or bucket of water.

 

[FirebirdXR]

The ability to read people's minds.... but only in Braille.

 

[darthmason0719]

The ability to determine what kind of dollar bill by smelling it.

 

[AMX58]

Superman need i say more

 

[Z of the Na'vi]

I believe a great man who makes videos on this very website once gave a prime example of a useless super power.

The ability to be invisible, but only while playing a trombone.

 

[mcnally86]

all of Superman,s powers but only if the planets align at a angle of 180 degrees
other then that future prediction but only useless stuff (like what you,re going to have for breakfast next day)

Too late Christopher Walken Has that power already. http://www.hulu.com/watch/4180/saturday-night-live-ed-glosser-trivial-psychic

 

[Isnack]

the ability to change a red traffic light into a green however it only works if im driving below a speed of 10km per hour

 

[Omega Pirate]

The ability to talk to fish.

 

[Wintermoot]

The ability to talk to fish.

that is pretty useful if you have to spy on a fish lover.

 

[Alar]

The ability to make the sound of a bell chiming whenever I blow my nose!