Fniff proves that you will not, under no circumstances, survive the zombie Apocalypse alive.

[Fniff]

why do people assume guns are the way to go anyway? they are loud, and will attract the zombie horde to your position.

all you need to do is destroy the brain. any blunt object will do.

all one needs to do to survive is secure food for an unspecified amount of time. either help comes, or you take a risk and try to escape your situation.

you dont really need to board yourself up, just find a high place zombies cant get to.

Food won't last forever, and even if you survive from having a sort of farm, the power would be off, or it would be winter.

Congrats, you are dead.

how do you think people survived without power? being self sufficient has it's advantages.

and considering most people are zombies, one can easily stock up on food.

Actually, it makes it harder.

Also, you are talking about people hundreds of years ago. Times have changed. Most of our life relies on power. No power,plus zombies equals panic.

Face it, you can't survive.

i'm not you. i can survive without power.

and how would zombies make it harder to find food? all you have to do is outmaneuver/outsmart them.

You can survive power cuts. That is nothing compared to the entire area going out, zombies killing anything that moves, and the military doing bombing runs.

You can't outmaneuver 500 zombies smelling human flesh, and cannot outsmart 500 zombies all heading towards you. You will panic.

 

[-BloodRush-]

lol think what you will.

 

[Fniff]

the OP is set in his view that humans suck at surviving. so i'm done using logic.

It's not that humans suck at surviving. It's just that we haven't being using it!

I freely admit that I am not able to survive anything close to a zombie apocalypse.

edit: Unless you are in the military, and that's not guaranteed.

 

[-BloodRush-]

the OP is set in his view that humans suck at surviving. so i'm done using logic.

It's not that humans suck at surviving. It's just that we haven't being using it!

I freely admit that I am not able to survive anything close to a zombie apocalypse.

edit: Unless you are in the military, and that's not guaranteed.

oh thats probably why i feel the need to argue your points. i was actually in the military...

i forgot most people arent. :/

 

[Baldry]

Well sir I believe that the only you will ever know is when it happens.....hmm ok lets do it, realese the virus, Muhahahaa.

 

[Fniff]

the OP is set in his view that humans suck at surviving. so i'm done using logic.

It's not that humans suck at surviving. It's just that we haven't being using it!

I freely admit that I am not able to survive anything close to a zombie apocalypse.

edit: Unless you are in the military, and that's not guaranteed.

oh thats probably why i feel the need to argue your points. i was actually in the military...

i forgot most people arent. :/

I meant that if you are in military currently, you would have guns,vehicles, everything needed.

But, the problem would be that you would have to fight in the front lines.

 

[-BloodRush-]

the OP is set in his view that humans suck at surviving. so i'm done using logic.

It's not that humans suck at surviving. It's just that we haven't being using it!

I freely admit that I am not able to survive anything close to a zombie apocalypse.

edit: Unless you are in the military, and that's not guaranteed.

oh thats probably why i feel the need to argue your points. i was actually in the military...

i forgot most people arent. :/

I meant that if you are in military currently, you would have guns,vehicles, everything needed.

But, the problem would be that you would have to fight in the front lines.

no i wouldnt use guns, for reasons previously specified. the noise attracts the zombie horde. getting a vehicle isnt difficult, but to conserve gas i would travel on foot. cars are also noisy.

 

[Fniff]

the OP is set in his view that humans suck at surviving. so i'm done using logic.

It's not that humans suck at surviving. It's just that we haven't being using it!

I freely admit that I am not able to survive anything close to a zombie apocalypse.

edit: Unless you are in the military, and that's not guaranteed.

oh thats probably why i feel the need to argue your points. i was actually in the military...

i forgot most people arent. :/

I meant that if you are in military currently, you would have guns,vehicles, everything needed.

But, the problem would be that you would have to fight in the front lines.

no i wouldnt use guns, for reasons previously specified. the noise attracts the zombie horde. getting a vehicle isnt difficult, but to conserve gas i would travel on foot. cars are also noisy.

Ah, but this leads to another problem.

You would be a prime target for people who are doing anything to survive.

Bandits.

 

[ProfessorLayton]

It's fun to pretend.

Either way, if you actually own guns and know how to grow food then chances are you might survive. How one will be immune, I do not know but it's fun to think about. Why do you think we play video games?

 

[MagnetoHydroDynamics]

If we are not talking the "virus" zombies (which would all die of hunger and exhaustion within a week), but the genuine magically-raised zombies, I have a good plan. It involves a katana and some weapon martial arts training I have.

 

[-BloodRush-]

the OP is set in his view that humans suck at surviving. so i'm done using logic.

It's not that humans suck at surviving. It's just that we haven't being using it!

I freely admit that I am not able to survive anything close to a zombie apocalypse.

edit: Unless you are in the military, and that's not guaranteed.

oh thats probably why i feel the need to argue your points. i was actually in the military...

i forgot most people arent. :/

I meant that if you are in military currently, you would have guns,vehicles, everything needed.

But, the problem would be that you would have to fight in the front lines.

no i wouldnt use guns, for reasons previously specified. the noise attracts the zombie horde. getting a vehicle isnt difficult, but to conserve gas i would travel on foot. cars are also noisy.

Ah, but this leads to another problem.

You would be a prime target for people who are doing anything to survive.

Bandits.

thats a very good point, and no matter what, i cant be properly prepared for foolish humans that will attract the zombie horde by attacking my little fort guns blazing. best i can do is be incognito and not attract any attention.

 

[Tekyro]

I think I saw a Cracked article a few months back basically summarizing the same thing you have, Fniff.

...

Your avatar scares me.

*Hides behind couch*

Now imagine a zombie Billy Mays.

 

[I Stomp on Kittens]

Bull Shit.

 

[HitsWithStyxx]

On the contrary, my dear friend, for I possess the Zombie Survival Guide!

I got myself a leg up! XD

 

[WaywardHaymaker]

Well, yeah, we ARE all fucked if a zombie virus is unleashed on the world.

But it's still fun to plan.

 

[SantoUno]

Fniff, you forget about one very important thing that Bill Murray taught me.

DRESS UP LIKE A ZOMBIE!

I mean, do we really know what Zombies use to figure out if you are human or not? Maybe they simply rely on vision.

Uhh yeah there's a fatal flaw with that.

Survivors and rescuing militia will NOT identify you as a survivor in dusguise, therefore you will most likely be slayed or gunned down if you're among other zombies getting exterminated.

Not to mention that even if you try to wander away from the horde if you try to seek out other survivors or rescue militia they will most liekly gun you down before you get close enough to show them you're in disguise.

OT: I would do whatever it takes to escape somewhere where I can live permanently safe. If that is not possible then I will just plant a bullet in my head, but not before enjoying my last moments of living doing something I love.

 

[Jaranja]

reading this post just made me a little bit depressed.

i think that humans could easily win against zombies, we have america. the ultimate weapon.

Not really, they'd probably just end up shooting each other.

Or they'd attack Mongolia or something.

I can see it in front of me already...

U.S.A.: What, we where bombing the Zombies!
A smart person: But there are no Zombies in Mongolia
U.S.A: Yes there are!
A smart person:.... where you looking for oil again?
U.S.A: .... OMGTEHZOMBIESARECOMINGGOTTAGO!

Hah!
That was funny and terrifying.
Funny because it's a joke and terrifying because it's true :<

And it was also fat!
Get it? Because America has the most overweight people in the world?
.....
It sounded funnier in my head, I'll admit it.

I think we just discovered why they're fat...

Funny
And
Terrifying

We're the smartest people in the world!

 

[SomethingUnrelated]

My dreams are crushed...

 

[maddawg IAJI]

Well the Zombie outbreak would have to evolve from something to affect us. Some people may be immune to the base disease that it evolved from and that enough may prevent zombification.

However, I'm quite aware that I will not survive the apocolypse and I always laugh at the people who assume they will. I always wondered why people never assume they may be the first to go.